Time For A Change

I think it’s time I return this blog to what I initially wanted it to be. It somehow became my diary about my issues with my dad, and while I will always be open and honest with you guys about that, I think it’s time I brought this blog back to its original intentions: “Life, Love, and The Pursuit of Medicine”. That being said, I’m gunna start back blogging more regularly, and put a little less into the “Life” (my issues and past and stuff), although there will always be support or an open line for anyone who needs to talk about their experiences or ongoing abuse, more on the “Love” my current dating habits, where you can give advice or opinion on different guys, and definitely the “Pursuit of Medicine”, because I’m making a lot of decisions here shortly about what I’m doing after I graduate!

Life is going really well. I’m super overwhelmed with school, big decisions, etc. But otherwise it’s going good. I quit my bottle service night time shift on Saturdays due to an altercation that happened at work last week, and I honestly just don’t feel safe. So now I’ll just be waiting tables for dinner. No more late nights, unless I get a bartending job! Also, I turned 21 this past month. It’s crazy fun, and I love being able to go out with friends. It was on my 21^st birthday that I really got close with a friend of mine, who I never thought I would be as close with as we are now, due to our completely different views on religion. But we’ve been able to look past that, and we’ve become so close due to our similar daddy issues. We’ll call her Alice.

Love is another story. Isn’t it funny how girls either have 4 or 5 great guys they can’t choose from in their life, or none at all? And God knows with this situation I’m going to choose wrong…. I’ll definitely do an elaborated post later tonight about these, but here are the current guys I’m thinking about:

Dentist Boy – We’ve brought him up before. He’s still around, but hasn’t formally asked me out to dinner, etc. Which I would like him to do? I don’t know. It’s slow moving.

Hockey Boy – Go figure, I initially chatted with him via Tinder, but met him in the bar literally the next night. He goes to school/plays hockey for a school about 5-6 hours from where I go. But he seems pretty great.

Blue Eyes – I met him at a bar (I know, a no-no), but he’s beautiful. His eyes are UNREAL. And he took me to dinner last week.

Kryptonite Man – We all know about this boy.

So there is that. Who knows?

As for the Pursuit of Medicine – I am officially conflicted. I love research. Like I never thought I would love it this much. Enter the crazy idea of going to get my MD/PhD. I know getting a PhD wouldn’t be satisfactory for me. And if I truly want to be a surgeon, then the PhD isn’t necessary, I can do clinical trials, whatever. But what if I get there and realize I didn’t want to do surgery? What if I end up doing Pediatric Oncology or something like that? I really have a passion for research, and I could do big things with an MD/PhD. It’s such a huge decision to make, and it’s really hard to pick a medical specialty without having hands on experience, which you can’t get until medical school. SO FRUSTRATING! I really wish I could figure it out soon.

I’m not taking classes this summer, which is nice, so I’ll be studying for my MCAT, which I’ll take at the end of June or July. Then who knows? I think I’ll apply to one or two med schools, but I really am planning on taking a year off to try and figure stuff out.

Thanks to all of you loyal readers, you’ll never know how much I appreciate you all!